Sex is like a soufflé

Sex is like a souffle. A souffle is complicated and unique. It is difficult to get it to finish well. It takes preparation and forethought. You cannot be distracted or have your mind on something else while you are cooking a souffle. Use just the right ingredients at just the right temperatures. Beat and whip, but not too much. Fold and test until everything is perfect.  Practice. Know your oven and test the temperature. Keep trying. It’s worth it – for the enjoyment, taste, and accomplishment.

You are not a hot pocket.
You are a souffle.

Your body is not a package of fake meat and cheese (even if it feels like it some days) that you throw in a microwave oven, and it’s done in 3 minutes.  You are a souffle that takes time and practice and love to prepare. You don’t make a souffle because you are hungry right now. You make a souffle for the love of cooking something special.
If you are treating sex like a hot pocket meal, you are not doing it right.
People treat sex like “I wanna do it and you should wanna do it with me too”… “I have this need and I am gonna use you to fill it”… “Hungry. Need hot pocket.” 

Instead of treating sex like the deepest, sweetest, most liberating and fun conversation EVER.  If we spent time preparing ourselves and each other FOR each other, we would have a much better meal.  We wonder why we don’t want to have sex… but it is because we think it is a 3 minute heat up and BAM we are aroused and then orgasm and then done.  That’s just not how it was made […]

By |February 26th, 2014|Love and Making It|7 Comments|

Take Care of You

It’s time to TAKE CARE OF YOU.

When I was training for my half marathon (that phrase still makes me laugh, it still seems preposterous, but I did it)….
When I was training for my half marathon, I ate whatever I wanted.  I needed fuel! If I was hungry after a run and wanted In n Out, no problem!  If it was 10p and I was starving, absolutely I could eat some delicious Honey Bunches of Oats (with almonds!).
Then, I ran the race in December!! It was amazing. I’ll tell you all about it soon.
And I just kept on eating in the days after the race too. Want pizza for dinner? Right on! Let’s do it.  It’s almost Christmas; let’s have pie!
Now, it’s been a full month AFTER the race and it’s time to get my act together. My body needs some anti-running exercise. My body needs some lighter food. My skin needs some winter care.  I’ve gotten so lazy after the exertion of the race that I don’t even like brushing my teeth.

Can you relate? You probably didn’t run a half-marathon. (Why would a sane person do that?)  But, you probably have some kind of whole food / walk everyday / drink a smoothie for breakfast / P90x / brush your teeth 2x’s a day ….. kind of goal for this month. Let’s do it together.
To quote one of my favorite movie lines ever; it’s time to “TAKE CARE OF YOU!”
It doesn’t have to be anything big. Small things can change your life.  I will bring you my favorite food, self-care tips and products, and exercise plans both here on the blog and on my Pinterest Boards.  Bring me yours too!

Today’s Take Care of You […]

By |January 10th, 2014|Healthy You|2 Comments|

What are you hungry for?

Hi Friends!


So I started asking myself, “What do I want in life?”

The answer that came back immediately …

“Coffee, please.”

“Maybe also a chocolate chip cookie and a long nap too.”


On one hand, that’s lovely and simple.

On the other hand…  That’s all I want out of LIFE?  Really? That’s it?! That’s just kinda sad.

That’s what I define as an attainable wish.

Somewhere in me is a quiet, desperate whisper for more.

There’s got to be more to life than the wish for a few sensory comforts, right?  Something real, big, energizing.

The little whisper for real meaning and purpose is so, so quiet most of the time and the longing for comfort and pleasure is oh, so loud: I want it!  I want it!  I want chocolate!  I want a nap!  I want quiet and time to myself!  I want pizza and diet coke and cookies and warm donuts and a margarita (together or separate – I’ll take ’em how I can get ’em)!

If I am not careful to pay attention to my true desires, i will

live from numbing agent to numbing agent trying to escape the boredom, sadness, isolation or frustration  – and when I am not doing that I am using those same things numbers to celebrate or care for myself.

I’ve been asking myself those hard questions you have to ask, if you ever want to change. What do I actually really want?
“What’s the thing behind the thing?” – Rob Bell
I want to feel good. Do you know what feels good?  To eat and drink until you are so full you just need to sleep. aaahhh!  You can then curl up and take a nap or watch a wonderfully mindless TV show and forget everything but that […]

Let’s Celebrate Life

When you go to Disneyland, you can ask for a big button to wear all day. It will say “It’s My Birthday!” or “Let’s Celebrate!”  And you can fill in your name underneath or write what you are celebrating: “Anniversary” or “Graduation”. Then everyone who works at Disneyland will see your button and comment and welcome you.

“Happy Birthday, Princess!”

“Happy Anniversary!”

We live near Disneyland and go often.  The other day my little girls and I were walking through the huge plaza full of people as another woman walking towards us caught my eye.  She wore a “Let’s Celebrate” pin, crew-neck t-shirt, big white sneakers and high-waisted shorts;  Typical, comfy, I’m on vacation from rural (fill in a state) attire.  I always think about the people at Disneyland as they walk past us. Is this their first time?  Are they spending 3 years’ savings to make these memories with their families at Disneyland?  What’s her story?

Then, as this particular woman moved nearer to us, I looked closely at her button and saw that it said “Let’s Celebrate… LIFE.” Instantly, all the details I had subconsciously noticed about her came into focus:  Comfy clothes. Thin, short, newly-grown-in gray hair. Pale and slightly puffy face…  New cancer survivor. Laughing with her friends. Walking through the Disneyland plaza. Celebrating LIFE.  Smiling at me as she passed.  She’s on a LIFE.


Life.  I want to be on a LIFE. Let’s celebrate… LIFE.

“Happy LIFE, Princess!”


So, step one of going on a LIFE – what that woman in big, white sneakers and high-waisted shorts wore all over her gorgeous face: Gratitude. For Everything. For Life Itself.


Gratitude.  It only happens in this exact moment.


What makes a LIFE? How does a person permanently change, ditch […]

Stop the DIE-ette (diet) and Go on a Life

Diet. Die.

“This diet makes me want to die.” “I’d rather live fat and happy than die skinny and miserable.”

Have you ever heard someone say something similar?
DIE ette: A little death. I am on a diet… I am dying a little bit every minute I am on this DIE-ette.
A diet used to simply be what someone or something ate regularly. A lizard eats a diet of crickets.  A koala eats a diet of eucalyptus.   Mythological super models eat a diet of champagne and cotton balls. I eat a diet of coffee, chocolate covered almonds, and pizza interspersed with meals of kale and chia seeds. (balance, People, balance.)  This kind of diet is FACT. It’s what I actually eat.

Then, there’s the DIE-ette. The one that kills your soul and sometimes your body a little each day.  This is the strict, short-term list of rules that You or Slimquick or the 4 Hour Somebody or Fruitarians United have decided you should eat.

I am suffocating under the conflicting Die-ettes I should be on. I don’t want to be on a DIE-ette. I want to be on a LIFE.

I WANT TO BE ON A LIFE.  Hear me?!

Do you want to be on a life too?

People go on diets together all the time. Let’s go on a Life together. We will start tomorrow. But for real this time.

By |January 30th, 2013|Healthy You|0 Comments|

Swag n Stuff – Best Shape of My Life

I’m in the best shape of my life as I write this to you. I am glistening with sweat – my abs hard and my hair somehow still voluminous and sea-breeze blown.  I’m enjoying eating a kale, chia seed salad and drinking a room-temperature glass of lemon water.
…Not really. Not ever. That’s not true.

I’ve been better than I am today, though… God knows. He knows. I’ve. Been. Better.

When I was in the best shape of my life, I actually got there after a 6 week diet and exercise bootcamp.

My abs have never actually been what other people would call “hard” or “fit” but I did have an actual waist. I was smaller at my belly button than at my boobs. It happened.

Funny thing. I thought I was changing for good… Forever. I thought I would never be the same after that bootcamp — I gave it a big push and worked hard.

I was proud. I had swag. Confidence. My hair bounced like you wish yours did.

New, baby, beginning habits were formed. I studied and gained knowledge. I set goals. I learned Right from Wrong (the capital letter kind of right and wrong).

Then, slowly, I made exceptions and had set backs… temptations… and celebrations… Consolations.

And now, I am my old, normal self again. The one who is a slave. A slave to destructive habits of comfort, indulgence, addiction, and doughy pizza. (oh, pizza… you abuse me and I like it)

Part of me still knows eating and laying around don’t lead to a healthy, vibrant life … but that part can’t convince the rest of the parts to get it together again.

Here’s why… That part knows it’s a forever decision this time. That big push.. Bootcamp… […]

By |January 31st, 2012|Healthy You|0 Comments|