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Write 31 Days 2015

Posted by Nicole on October 1, 2015

 

Hi Friends! Welcome.

Take a slow, deep breath.

Count to 4 as you inhale.

Hold all that breath in your lungs as you count to 4 again.

Then, when you are ready, breathe out slowly and fully.

*****

Welcome to this space. It is as much yours as it is mine. May it be a rest when you need it + a kick in the butt when you need that too. All these tiny pixels, created by fingers on keys, mean something to me + I hope they mean something in your life too.

We will talk about bodies + souls here. We will talk about love + making it. I am a pastor, speaker, writer, and a sex educator.

So, now that I’ve made every possible person slightly uncomfortable, let’s see what good we can do in this uncharted territory. Please proceed wisely and know your own boundaries. love, Nicole

*****

Body full of Soul is a series inspired by the annual Write 31 Days venture.
Everything is Connected. We are whole beings and it matters what you do with your body and how you think about your body.

Let’s set aside a little time each day in October to give attention to the miracle of being human.  We are made of stardust and the breath of God, after all.

 

Body full of Soul

All of the essays + pictures + sensual delights
will line up here for your attention.

 

ESSAYS + GOODNESS

  1. C.S. Lewis Said Something – on having and being

  2. Touch Me, Please, So You Can Touch Me – on angels and animals

  3. Imagination and Kissing – Anais Nin and me

  4. Good Night’s Sleep – relaxing

  5. Pique Your Curiosity – on Parker Palmer and the wildness of your soul

  6. Prayer for Love – seeing with new eyes and closeness of heart

  7. Life is a Freakin Miracle – presence and a Bible reading just for you

  8. Get Over It – let’s be brave and let’s make changes

  9. Glass Half Full – but that glas, though

  10. Loving Yourself – it takes a triangle. Part 1.

  11. Broken Bowls and Homes for Souls – melodrama and broken dishes

“You are pure soul and made of the ground.” – Rumi

You are a Body full of Soul

Body and Soul

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Quickie 3

Posted by Nicole on May 14, 2015

quick thoughts…to help you get in the mood for love…

 

Warning:

Hugging Causes Love

*****

Stand close to me.

Closer.

 

Wrap your living arms around me

and I’ll wrap mine around you.

Until our torsos press together so soundly

that our hearts can whisper in each others ears.

 

Hug me til I’m real,

til the day releases me into your custody.

 

Even the monks do it.

They say it causes love

forgiveness too.

 

We are both here,

maybe we should try it.

*****

 

Hug Me Til I'm Real

Wrap Your Living Arms Around Me

 

Previous Quickie Thought to help you get in the mood.

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Quickie 2

Posted by Nicole on May 12, 2015

quickie thought #2… talking to myself again…

 

Your fat cells cannot keep the love out.
Love penetrates.

You, my Darling, act like fat destroys Love –
like Love will disintegrate upon contact.

How weak and fragile you imagine It.

Love knows no destruction, fear, or preference
for which kinds of cells it touches.

As long as those cells carry the distinct signature inside
that reads, “You” … then they are each perfect. 

Love Penetrates

 Previous Quickie Thoughts to help you get in the mood for love.

 

 

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Quickie 1

Posted by Nicole on May 8, 2015

quickie thoughts…talking to myself again….

oh, hello, Body.

Tell me what you want. All of it.

I will listen and not laugh or judge.

I can’t promise to give you everything you want, but I will sit and wish with you.

 I can't promise everything, but I can wish with you.

Just because you want it doesn’t mean you’ll get it, but I sure do love to hear what you like and dream with you.

I’m sorry about the times in the past that I left this important middle part out – this part where I just wish and listen. I thought if I knew what you wanted I would have to give it to you. I didn’t realize the glory in just knowing and listening and waiting.

So, tell me, what do you want. All of it.

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Boudoir Pictures Story

Posted by Nicole on May 1, 2015

Why take boudoir pictures?
How to make taking boudoir pictures great?
What to look for in a great photographer?

*****

Boudoir Pictures. Why take them?

There are lots of reasons people do the things they do… but why on earth would an ordinary, smart person dress up in lingerie and try to be sexy for a professional photographer?

It’s similar to why people run marathons.

You could just run, you know. You don’t have to pay anyone to let you run 26.2 miles. You can do that stuff for free! Running is free!

People sign up for marathons because it is a measurable goal (and it’s kinda cool to run in the middle of an empty street). More importantly, it’s a powerful experience to work hard and do something that scares you AND have other people helping and cheering you on.

well… in regards to boudoir photos…it’s kinda the same thing.

You can be naked or even partially naked for FREE! You get that body for free! (well, most people do)

You don’t even have to pay anyone to take pictures of you. You probably have a phone with a selfie camera. You can hold that sucker just right and get a pretty good shot of your booty or smile or cleavage. It can be pretty powerful to take a picture and find your face or body attractive – especially when it is not an easy, natural decision for you to be in pictures.

I know, we’ve all seen so many women’s ridiculous selfies that we are pretty turned off to the idea, BUT you could take pictures of yourself and feel empowered and beautiful. It’s possible.

Don’t let other people’s drama reduce your story.

*****

(keep reading, I think this part is kinda helpful)

So, on a personal level, why take “Boudoir Photos”? Why take professional pictures that you and your partner would find beautiful and sexy?

The answer is in the question.

Because they are beautiful and sexy.

And, with the right photographer, they are a vulnerable, intimate, beautiful, sexy representation of YOU.

You, doing something brave. You, letting your spirit and soul shine in your eyes. You, using your whole body to communicate courage, playfulness, beauty, desire. You.

Have you ever shared a journal entry with your spouse? Or a painting or a poem? Come home from getting a new haircut you really love? Have you gotten dressed up and stood in the doorway waiting for your eyes to meet? Do you remember what it felt like to say “I love you” for the first time?

Taking the right “boudoir” pictures is a tiny bit little like that.

 

Vulnerability, Beauty, and Bravery | 1000strands.com

*****

My recent story.

I had been thinking about hiring a photographer for a boudoir-type shoot for over a year. I’d watched Groupons go by. I sent a few self-made photos via Avocado to my Love. But I was, honestly, dragging my feet on having professional pictures taken because…because, why?

I wasn’t feeling “worth it”… I wasn’t feeling “my best.” I wanted to look somehow better or at least feel better before I hired someone to take what are “supposed” to be “beautiful pictures”. (“quotes” make me feel better when being “vulnerable.”)

 

And then an old friend wrote to me out of the blue.

“I have been reading your blog for quite some time now, and I love it. It’s a great blog with a beautiful message…

…Our mission at Eye-Kandie is to show every woman how beautiful she truly is, to feel confident and comfortable in her own skin. Our desire is to enhance marriages, help heal broken relationships and restore and create a healthy self-image. We have been blessed with the creativity and resources to help women take his breath away all over again; creating classy and artistic images that will freeze time. Lastly, our goal is to provide a safe environment that is edifying and uplifting for the everyday woman. When women contact us for a boudoir session, it’s because they are ready to accept their bodies for what it is, right now, in this moment of their lives. Their bodies are beautiful NOW, just the way it is. The way HE sees their body.”

See, this friend is a photographer and it had been years since we spoke. In those years, God and her gut took her into an area of photography she didn’t realize would become her great ministry and passion.

She specializes in boudoir photography and asked if we could partner up. She would take my pictures and I would write the story of the experience.

Over coffee, we shared our kindred passion to see women embrace their own bodies and enjoy being alive. My friend Jeni and her business partner Sarah at Eye-Kandie, explained their process and the care they take to make sure each woman feels safe and empowered. They offer different locations, options to change outfits, hair and make-up (only to the level the client wants), and lots of guidance (i.e. encouragement and friendship) to help create the best experience and photos.

I said yes. I said yes to partnering up because I was excited to work with them. These are women who are smart and passionate and talented. After talking with Jeni & Sarah, I felt like I could put my (literal) self and my writing on the line with integrity.

If you are in Southern California, I would highly recommend Jeni at Eye-Kandie as your boudoir photographer. If you are far, far away… here’s what she did that was so great and what you should look for in a photographer.

Lots of creative, thoughtful preparation.

  1. She asked me what I wanted and gave me time to think about it. She started a Pinterest board where I could pin pictures that inspired me, that I loved, that were more than just “pictures” and were really the kind of art I wanted to create. We also pinned hair and make-up pictures so I didn’t have to worry that I’d look like someone else in my pictures. She got to know me.
  2. Her goal was my best experience. This included getting the best shots but never at the expense of my comfort. I filled out a questionnaire about my favorite parts of me, my husbands favorite parts, the parts I am shy about, the reason I want to do this, how much skin I was comfortable showing.
  3. All the prices were up front and I never had a doubt about their professionalism. If you have a doubt about a photographer, don’t do it. These people have to be responsible with your mostly-nude pictures. If they are not responsible in the prep process, get out.

Care and Artistry in the process

  1. I was a whole human throughout the entire process; never just a body. I did boudoir pictures years ago where I felt like I was taking school pictures but naked (doesn’t that just sound like the worst nightmare ever!). The photographer posed my hands and head and told me how to move my face. You want a photographer who allows freedom of movement and expression BUT still gives you guidance, pose options, small changes to get your best angles.
  2. Are they thinking through pictures your husband will love AND pictures you will love? There are angles and options that just hit the “YES” button for dudes. Those same pictures can feel a little extreme or false to a woman. A great photographer will talk about pictures he will love and ones you will love.

The Hardest Part – reviewing the pictures

  1. Ask the photographer how you will review the pictures. How many photos will there be? Where are you when you look at them? How long do you have to decide which ones you love?
  2. This is just the hardest part. Jeni was wonderful throughout it. Sitting and looking at pictures of your bare (in every way) self is difficult, but trying to form opinions on which ones are “better” and analyzing them is excruciating. You want a photographer who is patient and offers their opinion only when you ask. You want someone who pre-edits all the awkward ones OUT (I had a different previous session years ago where the photographer showed me ALL the pictures she took… pictures of me changing positions, making faces… I’ll never recover.)
  3. Most of all, you want someone who has the same goal as you throughout. That’s what got me about Jeni’s email and her mission statement. I knew we had the same goal with our art: Beauty and Freedom for all women.

 
Here’s the deal. Because I was lucky enough to partner with Jeni and Sarah at Eye-Kandie, any of you who are local and ready to do this… contact Eye-Kandie and mention me. You’ll get a $$ discount off whatever you choose to purchase with them.

AND I’d like to do something to help too.

The first 10 people to book boudoir pictures with Eye-Kandie, I would be honored to do a 30 min Skype call as you prepare to help cheer you on and answer any questions. 

I believe I am probably the only female pastor writing positively about boudoir pictures at this very second. (if not, let me know!)

“The way HE {God} sees their body” – as Jeni said in her email … That matters. That is grace and goodness and Creation and freedom and God and beauty and bravery. 

Your Body Is Good | www.1000strands.com

Yes, I believe in God.
Yes, I believe your body is Good.
Yes, I believe boudoir pictures can be edifying and beautiful and actually an incredibly holy thing.

I love my pictures and I will share more next week (appropriately, of course). 

 -Nicole

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The Best Reasons to Take Boudoir Pictures

Posted by Nicole on April 17, 2015

Hi there, Loves!

Boudoir Pictures are like tattoos. It seems like everyone’s getting them.

But, why? And what is the BEST reason to take Boudoir Photos? Didn’t your mom warn you never to have naked pictures taken?

Well, if you do them for the right reasons, they cannot be used against you.

The best reason to have professional boudoir pictures taken is FOR YOU. When you get them for you, they take on deeper significance and empowerment.

Let’s talk about 3 purely personal reasons you might take boudoir photos:

  1. Each step of the process requires bravery and vulnerability and those things = WINNING AT LIFE. There’s a sense of accomplishment that you did something scary, like jumping off a high dive or running a marathon.

  2. Boudoir pictures place you and your body in an arena only “sexy” people can go, so your brain must wrestle with believing YOU are sexy. In the process of taking the photos, you will think about your sensuality and how you can see yourself as beautiful in empowering ways.

  3. God sees you as “all beautiful” and these pictures are a spiritual exercise in believing Him. You act on the truth of your beauty and you have physical proof of your faith.

*****

Sit down, relax, and let me tell you a story.

Once there was a girl who didn’t like her body. She didn’t like the look of it. It wasn’t what she ordered. 

She tried and tried to love it and take care of it, but it never quite fit.  She’d all but given up, when one day she was reading and came upon a message that changed everything: 

“All beautiful you are, my darling, there is no flaw in you.”
Song of Solomon 4:7

You should know, she was a girl who believed in God – a God who created everything, including her. She believed this God made good things and loved her very much. If this was all true, then perhaps she was made well— without flaw, even. 

But she realized that she lived as if she were covered in flaws. Flaws in her skin, in her shape, in her size… even in the way she sometimes held her head crooked or had a double chin when she laughed really hard. 

What if she were ALL beautiful – without flaw? well, That felt absurd. But she sat with it and prayed, “Show me how you see me, God.”

And He slowly began to peel away the layers of lies.

I write about beauty a lot. I write about sex a lot. I write because that is how I process life. I write online because I have an artist’s heart and always hope my creations matter to one other human.

But it is not JUST writing or wishful prayer that changes me each day. It is in my habits {both physically and mentally}.

So, I do yoga. I even do this yoga when no one is watching. I allow sex to be both a physical and a spiritual practice. And I take big steps towards placing my own self into situations I would ONLY do if I believed I was beautiful. 

I take big steps towards placing my own self into situations I would ONLY do if I believed I was beautiful. 

Because I want to believe God and I want to be free.

We need to take action if we want to see change. We cannot go a different direction without taking steps. That’s called standing still. I wanted to MOVE into new ground. I was sick and tired of feeling bad about my body so I have been taking steps.

And now you know one major leap I took to help me see myself as a beautiful daughter of God.

Saying YES to a boudoir session with a sensitive, empowering photographer helped me take a major step forward in seeing myself as a beautiful woman. No joke. Those pictures are even more for ME than for my husband (and that’s saying a lot).

 

We will define boudoir pictures as: photographs where you are vulnerable, intimate, playful, sensual, and mostly undressed.

Boudoir Ideas // www.1000strands.com

For me, Boudoir pictures are not just a fad or a fantastic gift for your Love. They are an active step toward seeing your own beauty. You are placing yourself in a situation that you would ONLY do if you were attractive and sexy… “without flaw.”

In the preparation, in the actual photoshoot, and then in the viewing of the pictures, I was confronted with the lies I believed about myself.

What were those lies? I’m sure you know your own well…

That I was not worth looking at “in that way.” That I was being ridiculous taking “this kind” of picture. That I was honestly really lumpy and unattractive and it is embarrassing that I’m trying to be sexy. That it would be hard for the photographer to get a good picture of this body. That my husband would have to lie and tell me these pictures look hot. That it’s better to hide myself than show what my body looks like.

But,

I placed myself in an immediate and safe situation where I had to stand up under those lies, and in faith develop eyes that saw my own beautifully created body and soul… eyes that see me as a well-made part of creation and to even be so brave as to see myself as attractive and sexy.  It was not easy and never will be…

BUT IT IS CHANGING.

Regardless of your relationship status; having vulnerable, beautiful pictures taken of you is a powerful tool towards seeing your own beauty.

In the next couple weeks, I will write more on how to prepare for a boudoir-style photoshoot, what makes a great photoshoot, how to get the best pictures, how to make the entire process a meaningful & even spiritual experience, and what my time was like with my photographer.

Also, P.S. Even if you never take professional “boudoir” pictures… even if you maybe just try to take a selfie today without hating it, that is a step forward. My friend Melissa Hawks at Bedlam Magazine takes rad selfies that make me jealous in the best ways.

Place yourself in dreams you would only live if you believed you were beautiful

 Like the face you've been given
Want to read more? Try this one! I dare you to look.

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Beauty Manifesto

Posted by Nicole on April 14, 2015

My friend,

I have to tell you that you are beautiful. I have to. It’s almost as strong a desire as the one to tell you that you are loved.

You are Beautiful.
You are Loved.

Your worth and the permission to move through the world freely come from these two things and they can never be taken away from you.

You have been beautiful from the day you were born. Glorious skin and eyes wrapped snuggly around a soul. Muscles learning to smile and grab. Neurons firing and a brain learning. A divine miracle.

 

Baby Portrait

You’ve never lost any of that glory. It’s with you now. It’s been with you through all the horribly awkward years of puberty and dawning sexuality. You never lost it. You were beautiful then and you are beautiful now.

Perception is everything, isn’t it?

For long enough, we have allowed the developing, immature tastes of teenage boys and girls to define for all of us what beauty in a human looks like. Do you see that we still do this? Free-flowing, unorganized hormones and cutthroat social hierarchies do not get the final word on who is beautiful.

It’s absurd to exclude any human from their place in creation as a miraculous, breathtaking beauty.

So, it is time to go back to the source. My friend, no matter what age you are…

“All beautiful you are my darling, there is no flaw in you.” Song of Songs 4:7

And why does beauty matter?

Because it does. Beauty has mattered since the beginning of creation. Beauty matters to us and to the One who creates it all.

Beauty has it’s own kind of meaning, doesn’t it?

Simply to have beauty is enough reason to exist. We love beautiful things. Beauty draws us in. We pursue it with passion, whether it is a sunset, a potential lover, a work of art, a dress, a mountain range, or a baby’s tiny hand. We want to “eat it up” “jump into it” “have it” “watch it” “own it”… we love and want beauty. Beauty is a reason unto itself.

This is why beauty is wrapped up in power and confusing power struggles. We notice people who are easily seen as attractive to other humans and we want the power they have because of it. Recognized beauty is power. We see that we do not have that same power in our physical appearance and we conclude that we are not beautiful.

Do not jump to conclusions. You are beautiful. If your kind of beauty is not getting you what you want from the world, I’m sorry. That’s too bad. It does not mean you are not beautiful. It means you want things that people are not giving you and you are blaming your face or your hair or your waistline.

When we falsely believe that we do not have beauty, we start telling ourselves that beauty doesn’t matter — at least not our own beauty. We opt out and pursue different kinds of power and meaning.

We can pursue power without beauty in it. We can deny our own beauty and say we will get our power without it, but we are denying a fundamental piece of ourselves.

The world and all the universe is profoundly beautiful. To exclude our own physical bodies from what we see as beautiful in this whole space is to lose a sense of our place in creation. To deny your own beauty is to deny yourself wholeness and shalom.

You can hike through the mountains and know you are just as beautiful as the trees.  You can swim in the ocean and know you are just as beautiful as the waves. 

 

beautiful girl and the ocean

You do not need to fight for a spot here. You do not need to discount beauty as shallow or not for you. You can accept your own beauty and then go kick ass in whatever way you want to, Darling.

Your beauty has not been given to you so you can get things. Your beauty is yours like the ocean is the Earth’s: to bring life and meaning and tie it all together.

Spending time trying to make yourself beautiful is like spending time trying to make the ocean wet. 

Take good care of you.

But stop trying to fix you.

You are good. Well-made. Beautiful.

“All beautiful you are, My Darling; there is no flaw in you.”

Beauty Manifesto:
Each human is beautiful regardless of age, race, gender, weight, or ability. This includes you and me too.

 

Beauty like the Ocean || www.1000strands.com Accept your own beauty || www.1000strands.com Beauty Manifesto || www.1000strands.com

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Wild and Precious Life

Posted by Nicole on March 2, 2015

sometimes, I wake up already feeling behind.
when this happens, I let the wisdom in my pen speak truth.

What will you do with your one wild and precious life?

You woke up this morning already listing the ways you will fail – the tasks that will meet resistance and never reach the finish line. You lay, covered in clean sheets and painless skin, and yet you felt strangling discomfort in your soul.

Why, Darling?

Why have you forgotten your place? You are a child – a wild, lovely, free child – living in the world run by the most loving and responsible Parent in the world.

So, what will you do with your one wild and precious life?

or rather

What ARE YOU DOING with it? You can only live right now.

Landsliding to-do lists and performance reviews care for the future, but what are you doing to care for right now? Set time aside to tend the future – a set time to let your mind wander into next month and next year and even this afternoon. Carve out time-travel appointments, but do not forget to come back to this time and this place…this is where you actually live, My Love.

You are a flower, growing for such a short time. Be here. Growth and beauty and achievement will come as you soak up sun, water, and nutrients. Feel the strain and sensation of now – know that it is leading somewhere but that “somewhere” is none of your concern. Take each next step.

The act of attention is a form of prayer.

You’ll be surprised to find that as you witness the universe, the universe notices you right back. This is the glory of a loving Creator.

*****

The Summer Day
by Mary Oliver
Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean-
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

 *****

Wild Fox | www.1000strands.com

Photo found at http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/ngm/photo-contest/2011/entries/101679/view/

 

Wild Horse | www.1000strands.com

Wild Horse found at http://www.heartofahorse.org/category/beauties/page/158/

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Passionals Newsletter Sign Up Now

Posted by Nicole on February 5, 2015

Love and Making It
is about to start a new season

Hey, my friend! It’s time for us to start something new together. 

At one point or another you’ve read the blog, seen me speak live, or taken an ecourse and I want to THANK YOU for that. Thank you for joining me here. Thank you for being brave enough to even start reading and thinking about how to make your life better, braver, and more beautiful … even IN bed.  This is my passion = helping you find your passion.  

*****
I am floored by the good work I’ve been lucky enough to see some of you do. You’ve been brave. You’ve literally changed your marriages and lives by engaging with the heart and soul of LOVE AND MAKING IT. Thank you for letting me share in a little of your awesomeness!
*****

I am reminded that we all need this place… even when we are busy, actually, because we are busy. We need reminders everyday to take good care of our love-lives, because it’s a strong current pulling us back to confusion, ambivalence, fear, dislike, and exhaustion.

There are so many forces pushing us away from healthy sex lives.  Health is a constant practice, we can’t work out one day and expect to be fit forever. We can’t read one good article about sex and expect our sex lives to be healthy. This is a practice. 

And so here we are, about to start a new season.  This year I have more content and more bravery of my own and I am excited to share it all with you, but you know it’s more than just the content here – it’s about action and new ways of training our thinking about our bodies. 

My goal this year {and I hope you’ll come with me} is to provide you with more hands-on activities, perspective-changing tools, and even more HOPE that your body can be a great place to live and play. 

 

Your body can be a GREAT place to live and play.

Whether you are married, single, divorced… bigger than those categories… because who wants to be limited by their relational status?… There will be camaraderie and help through Love and Making It.  

This blog will still continue to cover all kinds of things (but be warned, there will be regular talk of sex in what I hope is a healthy, loving, brave way)… BUT

It’s time to sign up for my LOVE AND MAKING IT – PASSIONAL newsletter (no spam. it’ll come out about once week) and get more indepth articles plus hear first about ecourses, books, videos, activities and more… sign up for the LOVE AND MAKING IT newsletter:  PASSIONALS á GOGO 

What is a Passional?
Part devotional. Part sex-therapist session. Part drinks with a best friend.

Who should sign up?
You. And your friends. And people who love their spouse but want more inspiration in “loving” their spouse. Women who say no to sex when they have a headache, because they don’t realize sex can cure headaches. Men who wonder why women don’t seem to love sex. People who’ve been trained how not to have sex before marriage but not how to have sex after marriage. Anyone who wants healthy, honest, fun conversations about living well in out bodies + souls.  Love and Making It is for you.

You deserve bravery + beauty + freedom in bed and out!

Sign up for a weekly, free boost of inspiration and love. Do not let another day go by where you don’t feel beautiful and you don’t look forward to making out with your spouse. Let’s do this!  You and your spouse are worthy of love and good make-out-sessions. Sign up!

You’ll be the first to hear about special eCourses and goodies too!

 

imagine the possibilities

 

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I Dare You to Look

Posted by Nicole on April 6, 2014

I DARE YOU TO LOOK.

 

I dare you to look in the mirror and see beauty; see a face that God loves and made.

God loves your face. You are allowed to love your face too.

 

There has been a lot written about fasting from mirrors. Good challenges have come from good people to help end our obsession with mirrors and just go throughout our days without looking at ourselves constantly. These challenges can have important freeing effects for us as we try to stop obsessing about our flaws, but the mirror and the looking is NOT the problem. It’s always the motivations behind the actions that matter. 

 

We may fast from mirrors as a way to realign ourselves with the issues inside these bodies – the issues in our souls about worth and narcissism and the tension-filled dance we all move through each day…

 

We may fast from “looking” at ourselves so that the next time we look, we look with love and acceptance instead of obsession and self-loathing…

 

But we do not fast from mirrors because looking at ourselves is somehow less holy or less healthy than ignoring our outsides. It is not shallow to love your surface area.

 

In this culture, where a specific kind of beauty is power, there is nothing more Jesus-like or revolutionary than loving YOUR OWN face, no matter how it compares to anyone else’s. This is the upside down kingdom of God – where everyone is beautiful, even you. (Even if you don’t believe in God, trusting in the abundance and beauty of all people is powerful.}

 

Looking at your own face as a spiritual practice is a powerful rebellion.

 

I dare you to look in the mirror and LOVE your face.

 

Love your face, not because it can get you things or make you feel powerful (which is narcissism) but because it was made well.

 

I dare you to look in the mirror, not to fix yourself but to appreciate the glory of God’s creation. Looking at ourselves can be a distraction or it can be like a prayer of THANKS.

 

When it is not narcissism but gratitude that brings us to look in a mirror or take a picture, I believe we will have figured out a major riddle in life.

You are allowed to like the face you’ve been given.

 Like the face you've been given

You can be pretty sure that God wanted you to have your face… why would you ignore something beautiful that God has given you?

 

This may take work. This may feel harder than just ignoring your face. This may take redefining what “beautiful” means for you. It is hard to hold an opinion that someone else doesn’t agree with. It is hard to believe we are “good looking” when we feel other people disagree with us. But you are “good looking” and the only opinion that matters is your own and that of your creator.

 

If you love Jesus, You can look to Him and serve other people WHILE liking the body God gave you. You can love your family and be beautiful on the inside WHILE believing in the goodness of all creation, including your own body.

 

This actually helps us love other people better too. I no longer let the beauty of another person intimidate me or make me treat them any differently than anyone else. I no longer hide because I am having a “bad hair day” or a “fat day.” I can live freely and bravely everyday in the assurance that I am beautiful and made well. Then, I extend that same acceptance to those other people – they may look different from me but they are equally beautiful.

 

We climb mountains and travel 1,000s of miles to watch the sunset over the Pacific Ocean because it is beautiful. Yet, we are faced everyday with the greatest miracle of nature – the human body.  Take some time to appreciate being you.  You are beautiful. Take a look!

 

I dare you to look in the mirror at least 2 times today and say “Thank you, God for all of THIS.”

{It may add oomph to gesture towards your body while saying those words.}

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What if instead of avoiding the mirror, you really looked at your reflection?

 

What if you looked in the mirror not to fix things but to appreciate things?

 

What if we believe we are beautiful on the outside and the inside?

 

What if we started using our mirrors as spiritual tools?

 

What if you use your mirror as a way to see something beautiful everyday?

 

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It will take focus and work to believe our beauty. I want to help. Sign up for a worksheet/devotional on seeing and believing our own beauty.

 

 

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